A scream pierced my solitude, my childish daydreams. Impact. Shattered glass. Then…nothing. Silence for what seemed a whole eternity. Then noise reasserted itself with a pent-up vengeance. As I lifted my head, removing my arms from my face, reality roared back into existence. Sirens. Mommy? Glass…glass everywhere. "Are you alright?" "Let me get you out of there." "There's no room in the back. Let her sit in the front." "It's alright Phoebe. I'm right here." "Here you go. Here's a little bear, from our department ok? Do you want it? Here you go." "Are you hurt anywhere?" Band-aids. Scrapes. Minor injuries. Nothing of consequence. Not this time. This time was just a warning.
Laughter. Poking fun. Backseat madness. Up the mountain. Turns. Many turns. My stomach churns. Ice. Yellow ice. Dirty ice. Clean, white ice. It's a roller coaster adventure. Whoa. Haha. Pretend scare. Have a laugh. Repeat…fake--no…real. Real! Skid. Slide. The wheels on our car go round and round. And to the left. And to the right. 180. Warning…again. I guess I get two. To bad, I didn't pay attention yet again. Bad kid. Bad pho. Silly pho.
Cars pass. Building lights. LA nights…why do I feel so…uneasy. So sick. Why?... Daddy? Protect him alright? Better now? No not yet, still…queasy. What is it? Us? Protect us too God…brake lights. Glaring red.…closer…closer…...we should sto--"MOM!" …….bumper. Nothing again. Relief for the moment. But praise? Adoration? None of that. Silly of me. I was asking for it.
Dreams. Expectations. One more week. School starts soon. Freshman in high school. High school…Am I ready? Who knows…Dentist today. So tired. Yay! Pillow. =D nappie time…zzzzz…Sudden. Sudden are the moments that change your life…forever. Sudden was the car that appeared. Just as sudden gone. Sudden was my onset of fear. Down into the bowels of the car. Byebye pho. Swerve. Dance. Near miss. Right. Left. Right. Left. To and fro. A dance with death. Overhang. Cars below. Life is a vapor. Little wall here we come. Stop. We stopped. Airbags. Fog. Cloud. Dream? No can't be. Hurts too much. "I can't breathe!" Neither can I. Why? How? "What's today's date?" "Were you wearing a seat belt?" "No." "Were does it hurt?" "On a scale of one to ten how much does it hurt?" "There appears to be signs of discomfort. As well complaints of pain in the neck and lower back." It hurts. Stop talking. Just do something. It hurts. Why won't you do anything? "You can go." Ugh. Pain. Peak. Hole. Gash. Blood. Scar. Scarred for life. A week of pain. Should have seen it coming. I practically asked for it. Now I'll bear his mark forever. Please, no more wakeups calls. This rebel finally gets it. This child will no longer turn away, will no longer seek other hands. So thanks…thanks for the crash course.
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